(Shel Silverstein)
When I was a lad in a fishing town
An old man said to me
Iain, you can live your life, your jolly life
A-sailing on the sea
You can search the world for pretty girls
Till your eyes are weak and dim
But don't go swimming with a mermaid, son
If you don't know how to swim
Her hair is green as seaweed
Her skin is blue and pale
You can love that girl with all your heart
But I tell you now before you start
You're just gonna love the upper part
You're not gonna like the tail
Well, I signed on to a whaling ship
On my first day at sea
I spied a mermaid in the waves
A-reaching out to me
Come live with me in the sea, said she
Down on the ocean floor
I'll show you a million wondrous things
You've never seen before
So in I jumped and down I swam
Down to the ocean bed
And a pillow made of turtle shells
She placed beneath my head
She fed me shrimps and caviar
Served on a silver dish
From her head to her waist she was just my taste
But the rest of her was a fish
Her hair was green as seaweed
Her skin was blue and pale
Her face it was a work of art
And I loved that girl with all my heart
But I only loved the upper part
I didn't like the tail
But then one day she swam away
To sing to the clams and whales
I missed her skin, I missed her hair
And the silvery shine of her scales
Then her sister came swimming by
Set my heart in a whirl
'Cause the upper half was an ugly fish
But the rest of her was a girl
Her toes were pink and rosy
Her knees were blue and pale
Her legs were a work of art
And I loved that girl with all my heart
I don't give a damn about the upper part
And that's how I end my tale
(as sung by Iain MacKintosh)