Henry's Songbook

If I had a boat I would go out on the ocean
If I had a pony I would ride him on my boat
We could all together go out on the ocean
Set me upon my pony on my boat

If I was Roy Rogers I would sure enough be single
Couldn't bring myself to marry an old Dale
There would just be me and Trigger we'd go ridin' through them movies
We'd buy a boat and on the sea we'd sail

If I was a lightning I would never need no sneakers
I could come and go whenever I would please
I would scare them by the shady trees, scare them by the lightpole
I wouldn't scare my pony on my boat out on the sea

Now the Mystery Masked Man was smart, he got himself a Tonto
Tonto did the dirty work for free
But Tonto he was smarter and one day said, Kimo sabe
Kiss my ass, I bought a boat, I'm going out to sea

(Alternative second verse by Iain C. MacKintosh:)
When Trigger died Roy Rogers had him stuffed, then he put him
In a museum, you can see him there today
Roy must have loved his horse a lot to do a funny thing like that
So I hope his wife is feeling quite ok
(as sung by Iain MacKintosh)

[1980:] [The thirties were] the heyday of the singing cowboy in Los Angeles, a strange and rather wacky era that was mostly the result of Hollywood's desire to combine two of its most popular forms, the Western and the musical. [...] With all the yodeling and barbershop quartet harmony, it sounded more like Switzerland than Texas. But it was one of the biggest things in Los Angeles, and you couldn't turn on a radio without hearing the Sons of the Pioneers (whose lead singer, Leonard Slye, would become Roy Rogers) or some other group crooning a love song to their cattle. (Klein, Woody Guthrie 88)

[1991:] Dedicated to all life's Tontos, from Glasgow to Galveston. (Notes Iain MacKintosh, 'Risks and Roses')

[1995:] When I was a kid I wanted to be a cowboy. So I went to the movies and I watched Roy Rogers, our hero. He had a wife called Dale, who was in the movies with him, and a horse called Trigger.

The other cowboy movie star of the time was the Lone Ranger. He wore a black mask, you never saw his face. And he had a faithful companion, an American Indian called Tonto. And when Tonto spoke to the Lone Ranger he always addressed him as 'Kimo sabe'. Somebody recently explained to me that this is a corruption of the Spanish phrase 'quien sabe' and means 'He who knows nothing'. So I thought that was a nice insight into the relationship of the two men.

Then I learned that 'Tonto' is the Spanish word for stupid. So - I don't know what the scriptwriters were driving at ... (Iain MacKintosh, intro Kiel)

[1998:] Der singende Cowboy Roy Rogers ist tot. Er starb gestern im Alter von 86 Jahren in seinem Haus in Apple Valley bei Los Angeles. Die Karriere von Rogers, der mit richtigem Namen Leonard Slye hieß, begann in den dreißiger Jahren. Zunächst sang Rogers, dann eroberte er mit seinem Pferd Trigger und seinem Hund Bullet die Filmwelt. (Kieler Nachrichten, 7. Juli)

[1998:] Roy Rogers Died July 6, 1998. Born Nov 5, 1911, survived by his wife, Dale Evans.

[2000:] The late fifties Lone Ranger and Roy Rogers images are so familiar to our generation - the first of Scotland's tv kids. In the badlands of the Old West (Helensburgh? Ayr? Troon?) the streets were full of wee laddies with their faces masked in cut-off hems from their mothers' coats, singing very rude words to the William Tell Overture (The Lone Ranger's theme tune) while waiting to ambush the housing scheme Apaches. The horses were broom handles called Trigger, the weapon of choice was the plastic six gun. Ah, happy days ... But how many ten-year-old Tontos grew up dreaming of such cunning and sophisticated revenge? We'll never know. (Notes Iain MacKintosh & Brian McNeill, 'Live and Kicking')

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